Archive for October, 2010

Ad madness…

Oct 30

Posted by James Coon in The Sporting Line | 1 Comment

[World Series] I’m used to commercials on TV. Who’s not? But, hey, this World Series goes over the top. Suddenly I’m being reminded at every player’s pause to spit that something is being sponsored by somebody. There’s the McDonald’s Minute, the Geiko Game Summary, Coors Commentary, and Pepsi Postgame. Tonight they invited the winning pitcher over for a Sirius interview. I’m waiting for “This pitch brought to you by Prudential”. I thought Prudential always had a pitch.

All of the companies I mentioned except Prudential now owe me big for showcasing their corporate brand to my millions of blog visitors.

Play ball!…

Oct 30

Posted by James Coon in The Sporting Line | 1 Comment

[World Series] I’m learning a lot about baseball but I’m mystified by some things. Why are all the home plate umpires so, ummm…corpulent? Kathy says they wear a lot of padding under their umpire suit. They must. They’re all look kind of square.

I don’t know why the pitchers aim for the catcher’s glove. That’s a pretty small target. Why not just aim for the ump? He’s a walking strike zone.

Any takers?…

Oct 30

Posted by James Coon in On the Money | No Comments

3BD/0BA 978 SQFT UNIQUE ARCHITECTURAL STATEMENT! (No bath.) RUSTIC LIVING AT ITS FINEST! (Pellet stove and propane.) 360° VIEWS. (Ever since the big fire.) ROLLING ACREAGE! (All steep.) ROOM FOR YOUR IMAGINATION! (Ever since the big fire.) SECLUDED! (No help for five miles.) CUSTOM TOUCHES THROUGHOUT! (Indoor fire pit that started the big fire.) POSSIBLE HORSE PROPERTY (Once the grass grows back.) THIS ONE WON’T LAST! (Why buy a house that won’t last?)

Leave the driving to us…

Oct 29

Posted by James Coon in Highways and Byways | No Comments

Wheel of Fortune is really getting chintzy with their “prize puzzles” lately. Today the winner got a trip over to the bus depot with a round-trip ticket to anywhere in the State.

Opportunities everywhere…

Oct 29

Posted by James Coon in General Musings | No Comments

There’s this local doctor I hear is thinking of retirement. I figure that creates a void in the medical biz I might fill. I know my humorous from my femurous, after all.

You’d be surprised at how touchy everyone is about this M.D. license thing. Doors just close up. All ll I can find so far is an opening for a vitamin sorter down at CVS. Part time. That’s insulting. They might at least give me the minerals too.

Foul ball…

Oct 29

Posted by James Coon in General Musings | No Comments

[World Series] Hey! What is it with these SF Giants in the World Series? Shouldn’t they have their names on the back of their jerseys? I can’t tell one guy from the other. They all spit. I hear back in April outfielder Eugenio Velez entered a game with his jersey reading ‘San Francicso’. That doesn’t help.

Kathy says in Texas they’ll  be wearing shirts with their names on them, and the city spelled right—but they’ll still spit.

Pay attention here…

Oct 28

Posted by James Coon in Martial Arts Memories | No Comments

One of the most important things a self defense instructor can teach a woman is that you never, ever get forced into a car. Gun, knife, you don’t get in the car. Whatever the person might do here, where there is some chance of discovery or observation, does not compare with what they might do once there is not.

Adam likes the Giants…

Oct 28

Posted by James Coon in Things of Note | No Comments

I’ve been watching the World Series, of course. …And it takes me back to my own playing days in the Bigs. Oh yes—I was an all-around All-Star. I just prefer to remain humble about it.

Unfortunately, I was on IR most of my first and only season. I got a broken finger in a superhuman dash to intercept an errant foul ball—well on its deadly way toward an infant still in its mother’s arms. You’ll still see that up on the JumboTron from time to time, when things get slow. The finger’s never been right.

If you can find my Baseball card, it’s worth a lot.

Scrabbling

Oct 27

Posted by James Coon in Around the House | No Comments

We’ve been in search a of deluxe Scrabble game but, whew…these prices for new toys. We may have to consider a trip down to Gilroy Outlets to visit “Toys Were Us”.

We tried going to Craig’s List but but apparently everyone who’s got one is holding on to it—and the best offering I could find on Ebay was a set featuring extra Q’s and no U’s, two tiles permanently attached to the board with strawberry jam, and a bonus Scrabble Dictionary in French.

Spamage…

Oct 27

Posted by James Coon in Around the House | 1 Comment

Worthless and unverified facts: Hawaii likes Spam. I like Spam. I’ve got a spam filter. I only like Spam fried. A cat will eat Spam, and cats are very particular. A dog will eat the can. Hawaii eats more Spam than me. Don’t cut yourself when you open the can. You can be sure that Spam is proudly processed out of all the things nobody else wanted.